Gardening difficulties and frolicking armadillos
Hello friends,
*Barenaked Ladies voice* IT’S BEEN two weeks since my last infusion. I’m slowly shaking off the extra fatigue and managing to move beyond my couch. I made the mistake of clearing a new garden bed yesterday, though. Doing manual labor in 90° heat when you have a heat sensitivity is tricky, even on my best day. This close to an infusion, it went from challenging to scary pretty quickly. At one point, my heart rate spiked, and a wavy of dizziness and nausea washed over me. I ended up stripping down to my underwear and sitting on my pool steps to try to cool down. After ten minutes in the pool, my heart rate was still in the 105 area. I managed to drag myself into a cold shower, which helped. But once I calmed my body, fatigue was the only thing left. I don’t think I’ll be trying that again for at least another week.
Even with that scary reaction to heat, I’m pleased with how my garden is coming along. I haven’t even added any pollinator plants yet, but the birds, butterflies, and bees are all over my yard. They’re so calming to watch. I used to have trouble understanding the allure of birding, but these days I get it. Cardinals and blue jays visit most frequently, but occasionally a wren comes along for a sip of water from the birdbath. And while I haven’t seen any woodpeckers or owls, I can hear them in the trees. We even had a little armadillo visitor recently. At one point, he literally frolicked across my yard. Have you ever seen a frolicking armadillo? It’s beyond cute.
In case you haven’t noticed, nature has become quite the coping mechanism for me during COVID-times. Even now, as we approach the Return to Normal, I’m getting outside as often as I can. It’s more difficult during the Florida summer, but that’s where the pool comes in. It’s about time to bust out the float again. Then at least when I’m having a fatigue-heavy day, I can lounge outside instead of on the couch. I’ve really come to hate the couch this year. It feels like a death trap, a place I’m confined to instead of a place I choose to be.
All in all, though, life is pretty good. Sure, MS can be crippling. Same with depression and anxiety. And the recent explosion of antisemitism in the world is frightening. But my MS is stable. My antidepressants are doing their job. And I refuse to cower in the face of hatred. Sometimes I feel like the bad days come more often than the good ones, but I also recognize how lucky I am. Despite all my struggles, I have a superhero of a dad who takes care of me, I’m writing more than I have in years, and I have friends who lift me up and bring me joy. My life isn’t always easy, but things could certainly be worse.
See you next week,
Yardena