Hello friends,
Rosh Hashanah starts this Sunday at sunset, so I've been planning the menu for dinner and delegating dishes to different members of my family. I essentially became the matriarch of the family when my Geegee died, even though my mom and two aunts are still alive and well. None of them are as close to Judaism as I am, though, so I became the one to take up Geegee's legacy and ensure that the family has traditional foods to eat during holiday dinners. That makes me sad because, now that Geegee's gone, my family doesn't feel as Jewish as it used to be. My dad and I are both religious, but everyone else used to show up for dinners and go to synagogue to make Geegee happy. They don't try so hard anymore.
On the other hand, I'm so proud to carry on the traditions of my people and ensure that they reach the next generation. Jews didn't survive thousands of years of persecution just for me to be the weak link. Preparing for the High Holy Days also connects me to Geegee now that I have taken on her responsibilities. Wherever she is, I know she's crying tears of joy.
I've also been thinking a lot about forgiveness, a big theme of Rosh Hashanah. Mainly I'm working on forgiving myself when I don't live up to my own ideas of perfection. This theme seems to come up for me every year, but I think I'm improving at it.
Anyway, I hope those of you who celebrate it have a good and sweet new year. Shana tova umetukah. See you next week—and next year!
Yardena