March is MS awareness month
Hello, friends.
Sorry about not writing to you last week. My fatigue this past month has been frustrating beyond words. I only get a few good hours in the early afternoon most days. Before that, I'm sleeping, and after that, I'm lying on the couch until it's late enough to go back to sleep again.
I'm learning, though. Rather than beating myself up, I'm getting the most out of however many hours my body can handle. I get the hard things out of the way early and save the simpler stuff for later. I write down fragments of thoughts when they come to me and form them into a complete poem or essay when my brain can focus a bit better. I'm trying to find joy in my fish tank and my weighted blanket and my books. They're small things, but clinging to them is better than falling into a cycle of self-pity.
The past week I've woken up a little earlier and had a bit more energy during the day, so I'm hopeful for better days ahead. I'm also excited because March is MS awareness month. When I was diagnosed, I knew almost nothing about this disease. The more I learned, the more I wanted to crawl into a hole and wither away. But instead, I found an amazing community of others suffering from MS and other autoimmune diseases. And I learned out to keep going.
Multiple Sclerosis can be an incredibly isolating disease. People often think I'm fine because my only visible symptom is a slight problem with my leg. They don't see the fatigue or brain fog or memory issues. They don't know that I start my day about 65% charged and only go downhill from there. They have no idea how it feels to suddenly be in a different body from the one they've known their whole life. So I'm doing my best to be one of the many people fighting for recognition for invisible illnesses. Just because I look fine doesn't mean I am.
If you want to learn more about MS or get involved with raising awareness, I encourage you to visit the National MS Society. And of course, as always, feel free to reply to this email with any questions you might have (or if you just want to say hi).
I'll see you next week,
Yardena