Apologies for not writing the past couple of weeks. Fatigue has had me in a stranglehold. It’s not uncommon with this disease. I’ve learned not to fight it because no matter how hard I resist, exhaustion always wins. It will probably be a short one this week.
When I’m this tired, I don’t do much. My body can barely move, and my brain feels like it’s floating in molasses. This is where nature documentaries come in. Calming and meditative, they don’t require a lot of focus. Currently, I’m making my way through Earth at Night on Apple TV+. It’s shot on highly sensitive low-light cameras, so that night looks like day. It’s the opposite of wandering in the dark after a hurricane. Tom Hiddleston’s dulcet narration provides a sense of moonlit serenity.
This letter is pointless. I’m going to keep writing it, though. That’s life, right? Sometimes it’s grand and meaningful. Other times it’s nothing more than watching nature documentaries on the couch and doing dishes between episodes. I think the boring stuff can be just as beautiful as the profound.
That’s it for this week, y’all. I tried, but my brain is in full-on MS mode. I like to show you this side of my life, though. The Internet has a way of making everyone’s life look grand and luxurious. I am not living any better than the rest of you. I’m eating pretzels dipped in Nutella and watching hockey. I’m going to bed at 10:30. I’m checking the mail and groaning at how it’s all election nonsense. And yet, I’m at peace with my life (most of the time). I hope you’re at peace with yours.
Until next week,
P.S. This is your last chance to read my beach/hurricane essay. It’s going behind the paywall in a few days.
Nothing else because I’m sleepy
Thanks for sharing this, Yardena. It is generous to let people know what it is like to live with physical limitations, and something so many of us would do well to understand better. Certainly the notion of what a good, meaningful life is deserves consideration too. Please take care.
Rest well, Yardena, life sounds good just living it. Pretzels, nutella, a little hockey, and reading this is more than enough luxury compared to most things going on around us, and deep down everybody feels it.